Examples of how NOT to get a job

In my search for my first job after graduating college, I applied to any job that I was remotely capable of doing, whether because I'd done the job in the past, or the skill set sounded very similar to what I was doing at PSU. And for all of December I was applying for jobs and not getting any kind of response for my efforts. So like any human being I became frustrated, Probably more so than I should have been, but regardless, I was frustrated.

So when applying for jobs, I let that frustration out in some of my online application questions.

Do you consider yourself an expert in Linux?

“No. Even though I've been playing with it for over ten years and I am consonantly being challenged by it. All the new features that come out with each kernel version just keep things new and interesting. Linux itself is a moving target, and I feel the only people that can call themselves linux experts are the kernel developers. Everyone else is intermediate, including me.”

And of course this little nugget of pure angst:

Please read the job description below and tell us why you are a great fit for this position.

“Although I am a recent college graduate. And I know that in this bad economy that there are better qualified people for this job I can offer a couple of things that they can't. Because the other people might be better qualified, they will also be better qualified for other jobs once the job market improves, thus anyone you hire will probably leave sooner as opposed to later. I on the other hand have a lot of growing to do, and finding an environment that allows me to do such would be beneficial to everyone. I can attain the same level of skill as these other candidates, but I will also do it for cheaper ( as I have little experience now) and will probably stay longer because I need to build up the time to build up the experience.”

Both of these questions came from two different job opportunities, and I'm sure you are just as surprised as I am to hear that neither of these companies have contacted me. Which is kind of sad in a way because if one of them did, I would know that THAT company is one worth working and toiling for because it at least has some semblance of a sense of humor. Alas, no love for the little angry wanna-be worker bee.

On the positive side, I have received a job offer from one company. So the hard work is done. I'm going to ask for some time to finish up what current interviews I have left, and see if any more job offers roll in before deciding which job to take.

UPDATE: Never tell the CEO of a social networking company that social-networking is "nothing more than self-aggrandizement and is just a fad".

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